No More Bad Hair Days...

As I was showering yesterday clumps of hair were in piles at my feet. I new that it would be my last day with hair (at least for awhile). Sheryl's hairdresser has offered to shave my head today, which is so much easier than waiting for it to just fall out. Besides, it falls out in bunches, leaving patches all over my scalp...not pretty. After I got dressed I went in to take a comb to my hair and there was a part sticking straight up, so what did I do? Just pulled it out :) that was the solution.

I keep reminding myself that no hair is so much easier than dealing with haircuts, dye jobs, and the cost of haircare products. And besides that, you never have bad hair days!

Peace to you all ~ Love, Genie

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Potomac Pl,Gilroy,United States

The Cather's Inn...

We came down to Gilroy last night to spend a few days with my brother Jeff and his family. It's literally like staying at the "Cather's Inn" when we come to visit, it's purely rest and relaxation :) Besides the comfort of their beautiful home, Sheryl is an amazing cook and they feed us very well.

This morning I was going to accompany Sheryl to her hair appointment and I was supposed to be ready by 8:30, but unfortunately I was in a lot of pain in the early morning and automatically turned off my alarm clock when I got up to take meds. What a bummer, I was really looking forward to some girl time with my sister-in-law. Although my hair is about to fall out, I was going to have a nice shampoo :)

I'm using Jeff's iPad right now and I must say it's pretty damn cool! To be able to sit anywhere and blog without having to use a computer or laptop is amazing...I'm a HUGE fan. And to think of all the other features it has on it (video chat, internet, app store, etc) this is pretty incredible. There you go Jeff, a nice plug for you! My brother happens to work @ Apple :)

Well, that's all for now. Who knows, I may even post again while we're here.

Peace to you all ~ Love, Genie

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Potomac Pl,Gilroy,United States

Another Gloomy Day...

I just wiped the speckles of barf from my glasses, boy what a life. Feeling like crap, been sleeping for over a week. When I'm not sleeping, I'm throwing up. UGH!! Yesterday Luanne asked for Dr. Hui's number because she knows there are more meds out there to help me through this tough time and she's determined to get them for me. Thank you Luanne, I honestly don't know what I'd do without a friend like you.

I haven't lost my hair yet, but I'm expecting it to fall out very soon. The nurse during chemo said it would be 14 days afterwards and it's been 9, so I still have a few days, although I know that was just an estimate. I plan to get started on the video taping this coming week (during which John will be on vacation and can help me) and I should still have hair. It's important for me to capture the "before" so that I look normal in the beginning of the taping. Since I have no idea if my hair will come back or when, I want to get some footage in soon.

Well, off to eat some beef broth for lunch in hopes to keep it down. I doubt it, but there's still hope. I will always have hope, prayers, and a whole lot of love.

Peace to you all ♥ Love, Genie

Here We Go Again...

Today I started on a new chemotherapy (treatment #46) and it'll be one week on, two weeks off. Along with the new schedule, come a list of new side effects, most of which I've already dealt with. I was warned, however, that I'll be losing my hair in about two weeks :( yay. They also warned me that I would be experiencing more nausea and vomiting than ever before. The two new drugs are Adriamycin and Cytoxan. The Adriamycin (also known as AC) is administered as a "push drug", where they actually push the meds into my port by way of a syringe rather than using a "drip" method that I'm used to. The Cytoxan is in the form of a drip. The whole treatment took 2 1/2 hours because they had to give me the Zometa treatment which is administered every 6 weeks for osteoporosis, to keep my bones strong. Without that, my treatment should last about 1 1/2 hours.

As soon as I got home I started to notice that my stomach was a bit uneasy and before I could even find "the bucket" that I usually use, I had projectile vomiting...in the garage! Luckily, the cat box was close by and so I proceeded to stand there and finish up. I'm sure glad there wasn't a cat occupying it at the time! Boy, this is going to be fun!

That's it for now :)

Peace to you all ♥ Love, Genie

Feeling Much Better...

Yesterday was Jordan's talent show for school and it blew John and I away. That was not the "depressed" girl we've been dealing with lately up on that stage. She was incredible!! Not only was she the emcee for the show, but she had three acts and she was one of the judges for another couple acts. Needless to say, she was very involved in the show and even was given a bouquet of flowers at the end for her efforts. We are so proud of her, she did an amazing job. Apparently she wrote the entire show (and supplied the students with scripts)! We had no idea she was doing all of that, it's no wonder she feels overwhelmed at times!! Duh!!

As for me...I'm doing much better. The pain in my chest has subsided and my hip has even gotten better. It's not all better, don't get me wrong, but it's improved. I'm still on pain meds, but it's been scaled down, and I haven't vomited in a couple weeks. I go see Dr. Hui tomorrow and will probably start on a new chemotherapy within the next couple days. Who knows if I will lose my hair again, but as Luanne has always said, "at least you know it's working if you lose your hair"! So...in that case, I'm looking forward to wearing hats again :)

Another thing that I'm dealing with, is the fact that apparently I'm not working enough these days to cover my health insurance (which is VERY frightening) and so I was given the choice to either (a) work a minimum of 40 hours in a month, (b) go out on a medical leave of absence, or (c) go out on a disability retirement. I was devastated!! First of all, although 40 hours seems like a piece of cake (and it used to be), it's very difficult for me to do that nowadays. I can barely get in 6-8 hours a week, let alone 10 and if I can't for some reason make it in, I would be behind in hours and wouldn't be able to make them up. Because of chemo, it limits a lot of my time (due to the treatment, the downtime, etc.). So John and I spoke about it and decided that I would probably go out on a medical leave of absence and I called work to tell the timekeeper my decision. Well, apparently, the person who works in HR who knows all about that and who can answer all of the questions that I had, works limited hours and won't be back until Tuesday. So...we have to wait until Tuesday to get this rolling and then I will feel much better, just knowing that my insurance is no longer at risk.

Well, I wish you all a very happy day. Enjoy your Sunday!!

Peace to you all ♥ Love, Genie

Passing Over...

I'm adjusting well to radiation and I have 4 more treatments until I'm done. I can't wait to get started back on chemo, because it scares me to think that the cancer might be growing during these few weeks without it. There's a new pain that started yesterday and it's located in my chest. I know there's cancer behind my chest plate, so I'm assuming that it's probably the cause of this pain, but I'm not sure. If it continues I will contact Dr. Hui. Otherwise, we meet again on 3/07 for my next appointment and I'll inform her then. At that time I'd like to get a copy of my bone scan and I'll be able to see whether the cancer has grown in my chest or not. Gee...if it's not one thing, it's another, right?! This new pain feels like somebody is sitting on my chest and I'd like them to get off!! I've been applying heat, but other than just taking pain meds, I don't know what else to do. Hopefully it'll leave just as quickly as it came.

My cousin Linda sent me some wonderful books and I haven't been able to tear myself away from the first one, it's about the afterlife. I believe I'm a pretty spiritual person and if what this book is saying is true, heck, you're not getting rid of me very easily! This book is saying that we don't actually die when we leave this earth, but rather take on another journey of life. A non-physical one. I'm not scared to die, I just don't want to leave my family and friends, for I don't want anyone to be sad. I'm most concerned about my children and John. The kids are pretty resilient and will eventually be fine, however, losing your mom at a young age is so hard, I just don't want to cause them pain. And as for John...he's my best friend, my love. I will hope that he finds love again and remarries, for he's young enough to continue on with somebody who will treat him the way he deserves to be treated. As long as this person takes GOOD care of my family, I won't be "haunting" them :) Otherwise, they'd better watch out....LOL.

I sure hope I didn't freak anyone out because I was talking about passing over. I'm not trying to do that. Please understand that I blog about what's on my mind, nothing else. It's going to happen eventually and I'd like to be prepared as much as possible. I haven't started on the video yet because the kids have been out of school and my plan was to tape while they weren't around. Their vacation is over after today, so I should be able to start on the video taping this coming week.

Peace to you all ♥ Love, Genie

So Far So Good...

Today I went for my 4th radiation treatment out of 10 and so far, it's been great. I learned to disassociate the vomiting with going to radiation and I haven't had a problem since then. As a matter of fact, I haven't had any problem at all with nausea and vomiting! Yahoo! I noticed after my very first treatment that there was a difference in my hip, that I could walk a little bit better. After the second treatment, I could walk even better. Well, after four treatments, I figured that I could try and work today. Although it wasn't easy, I managed to put in 4.25 hours today. I'm planning on returning tomorrow for the same amount of time, however, I'm going to bring the cane tomorrow when I go. Even though I've been able to stop using the cane, I still think it'll come in handy toward the end of my shift. Today I was in a lot of pain toward the end, and limping was starting to really take it's toll on me, where after awhile my good side started to ache from babying the bad side for so long. By the time I got home, all I wanted to do was go to bed. I literally planned on calling it a night at 6:15! I started to fix dinner, but I was hurting so bad that Johnny came in and offered to finish for me and after thanking him, I said goodnight. Well, as you can see...I'm up again and feeling much better than earlier. If all goes well, I'll be able to put in some time at work tomorrow.

Peace to you all ♥ Love, Genie